


You Would Have Been So Proud

by theRadioStarr



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Loss, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Past Relationship(s), Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-03
Updated: 2015-12-03
Packaged: 2018-05-04 18:43:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5344562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theRadioStarr/pseuds/theRadioStarr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Reaper War is only a few months gone, but already Jack is being set up by the Alliance for great things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Would Have Been So Proud

“They want you, Jack. Badly.”

“And since when have I ever fucking cared about what anyone else wants of me?" 

Admiral Hackett sighed defeatedly, and Jack fought to keep a frown off her face. He was so patient, putting up with her like this. 

"Jack,” he answered, voice quiet and tired, “I thought you would want this.”

“Why?” Jack countered. “Because I’m powerful, and this would give me more fucking power? Because the Alliance wants to keep me under control with thinly veiled ‘invitations’ to prestigious programs other people have had to work and fight for their entire fucking lives?”

“I thought you might see it as a tribute.”

Jack froze. 

“They want you there, Jack. You survived the Reaper War - with  _John Shepard_ , of all people. You weren’t just some soldier out there fighting, but a  _very_  valuable and influential part of our victory.” Hackett sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Everything you helped accomplish in the War is seen by the Academy as passable with honours up to N6. And if the other N7 initiates have an issue with you - well, I thought you liked hard fights?”

Jack didn’t answer, her thoughts spinning around in her head. She was being too short with Hackett, she knew it, but the war had only ended a few months ago and she was still grieving. The Reapers may be gone for good, but they had taken the man she loved with them. 

“Jack, he would have been so excited for you to do this-”

“What the fuck do you know about what he’d want?” Jack shot back without thinking. “All you ever fucking did was send him on useless sidetrack mission after useless  _fucking_ sidetrack mission throughout the whole fucking War, not even thinking about what it was costing him to turn away from other places that needed his help. You never once worried about how he was holding up - not as a fucking  _person_ , just as a fucking  _soldier_ , a pawn to your grand fucking scheme. You didn’t even fucking believe him until the Reapers started harvesting  _on Mother fucking Earth_." 

Hackett didn’t respond to her; in fact, his expression didn’t even change from the tired, weary sadness he had been regarding her with before. They stared at each other in silence for about a minute, until Jack’s rage subsided and the guilt set in.  _For fuck’s sake, John, why did you have to make me an emotional bitch instead of just an angry one?_

"I wouldn’t be standing here if you hadn’t, though, would I?” Jack offered in lieu of an apology. She sighed and scrubbed at her eyes. When she took her hands away, Hackett was gathering himself up to leave. 

“Just - just think about it, okay?” he told her as he ran his hands down the front of his dress uniform, grabbing the bottom hem and pulling it down so his shoulders would sit in place properly. Jack watched him cross the large room, and when the door blinked green and started to slide open, she jumped up from the seat she was in. 

“I’ll do it,” she called after him.

Hackett stopped, turning around to look at her over his shoulder without a word. 

“You’re right,” Jack admitted. “He would have been so proud of me. What kind of fucking idiot would I be to turn this down? But I can’t do it for him, Hackett. I have to do this for me.”

Hackett smiled at her and nodded slowly. “I’ll let the Academy know." 

Jack took a deep breath and sank back into her chair, picking up the datapad she had been looking at before Hackett came in to see her. She was just about to find her lost spot when Hackett cleared his throat, drawing her attention again. 

"Are we still on for lunch on Friday?”

Jack smiled back at him. “You better be there, Pops, or I’ll cause a scene.”

Hackett chuckled at her, the sound low and carrying across the room. “I’ll bring all the information you’ll need with me." 

"Hackett?”

“Yes?”

Jack stared at him in silence for a few seconds. She had never known her parents; all she remembered was her cell at the Cerberus facility. But Hackett… well, Hackett was starting to feel pretty close to what she imagined having a father would be like. 

“Thank you. I’m sorry I got so angry." 

"Anger keeps us healthy, Jack. Don’t ever be afraid of it.”

Jack’s expression relaxed as she laughed. “Who the fuck told you I was afraid of anything?" 

Hackett laughed again. "I’ll see you on Friday, Jack.”

“Later, Pops." 

She watched until the door slid closed, and then she remotely set the lock. Jack took a deep breath, and let herself fall back into her depression. 

_Look, John. I’ll be an N7, just like you_. She grabbed a picture from her desk behind her - they had bought it at the combat simulator on the Sunset Strip, a perfect shot of the Mech exploding behind them as he pulled her in for a rough kiss - and the first tear slid down her face. 

_You would have been so proud._


End file.
